Have you ever found yourself really wanting to do something, but you’re too embarrassed to admit it for fear of ridicule. So you end up making excuses to convince yourself and others that you’re not really bothered?
I’m remember doing this to myself many moons ago when I began to study Hypnosis and Hypnotherapy, a colleague said to me “Hey, wouldn’t it be really cool to perform Hypnosis like Paul McKenna or Derren Brown?”. My response to this was something along the lines that I wasn’t really bothered.
I really did want to perform the kind of things that McKenna and Brown did as I admired them for their skill and delivery as performers. But somewhere in my mind I was saying “What if I couldn’t do it?” and the answers to this question provoked lots of pictures of me failing and lots of people laughing at me, causing me to feel an inner tightness as the potential embarrassment washed through my body.
The key here is to face up to the core problem, which in my case was not failure of not being able to perform these techniques but the ensuing feeling of embarrassment.
So in order for me to achieve my goal, I had to find a better way to deal with feeling embarrassed, or certainly to acknowledge it and prevent it from making me start trembling, sweating and blushing.
The first thing I did was relax by breathing diaphragmatically, breathing in through my nose, down to the bottom two thirds of my lungs by pushing out my stomach (rather than lifting my chest and shoulders), holding the breath for a moment and fully exhaling through my mouth. This triggers your parasympathetic nervous system and calms the body producing by producing chemicals that relax the whole body and mind. I recommend you learn and practise this technique; you could do a Google search or even by a book on relaxation?
The next thing I did was to relax my posture by sitting back to release any muscle tension and then began saying positive affirmations to myself. I began with “I can do this” and created pictures (and movies) in my mind of lots of other occasions where I had overcome adversity to succeed and thought of the feelings I felt afterwards.
Give it a go…now…think of a time you overcame something to achieve a positive result. Close your eyes, remember it as if you were really there, what could you see? What could you hear? What did you say to yourself? How good did you feel? And notice how much better you feel afterwards…
For those of you who were interested, I did become a very good Hypnotist and Mind Magician very quickly and perform regularly at parties and social functions. Do I get nervous? Yes! Do I have the tools to control this? Yes, and now so do you!
Monday, 17 November 2008
Monday, 27 October 2008
Credit Crunch...or new opportunities?
The news and other media are normally crammed full of negative things that are happening in our world and lately the focus is on the state of the world's financial status and how this could affect us.
I must admit, I don't watch much T.V. as I find a lot of it disempowers me and leaves me feeling flat. But, these negative stories are what sells papers.
I have a friend who, come rain or shine, will tell me a story of something negative that is happening in the world and will proffer advice on why I shouldn't do this or that because of the risks involved. I'm glad I have balance in my life, because I have lots of other friends who are supportive and positive, they look for the ways things can be achieved and the ways to overcome the obstacles in the way to achieve.
One of these friends was telling me this week how he had bought some computer hardware as it was now so cheap, if you look around now is a great time to buy things and invest in yourself.
But the main point I want to make is that any situation in life is what we make it. Our brains are trying to take in 4 million bits of information at anyone time, but we are only able to process 134 of them. So if you are filling these 134 bits with the negative things around you, this will affect the way you feel and consequently your behaviour towards those around you. However, if you choose to read positive books, surround yourself with positive friends, breath fresh air (I love the crispness this time of year) and eat healthy food, guess what? You'll feel a lot more positive and that will affect the way you behave around those you love and care for.
We will always be faced with challenges in our lives, how we deal with these affects, not only the way we feel but whether we succeed in life or not. Sometimes we need help with that, yes, even therapists, but if that can help you achieve want you want more quickly, then it's good enough for me.
Remember, when you're ready to move forward and leave something negative behind, I'm on the end of a telephone.
Call me now on 024 7667 5520, invest in yourself!
Kind regards,
Nick
P.S. If you would like these posts and videos sent to you as a newsletter, please email me at ndhypnotherapy@btinternet.com and put "Subscribe" in the subject box.
I must admit, I don't watch much T.V. as I find a lot of it disempowers me and leaves me feeling flat. But, these negative stories are what sells papers.
I have a friend who, come rain or shine, will tell me a story of something negative that is happening in the world and will proffer advice on why I shouldn't do this or that because of the risks involved. I'm glad I have balance in my life, because I have lots of other friends who are supportive and positive, they look for the ways things can be achieved and the ways to overcome the obstacles in the way to achieve.
One of these friends was telling me this week how he had bought some computer hardware as it was now so cheap, if you look around now is a great time to buy things and invest in yourself.
But the main point I want to make is that any situation in life is what we make it. Our brains are trying to take in 4 million bits of information at anyone time, but we are only able to process 134 of them. So if you are filling these 134 bits with the negative things around you, this will affect the way you feel and consequently your behaviour towards those around you. However, if you choose to read positive books, surround yourself with positive friends, breath fresh air (I love the crispness this time of year) and eat healthy food, guess what? You'll feel a lot more positive and that will affect the way you behave around those you love and care for.
We will always be faced with challenges in our lives, how we deal with these affects, not only the way we feel but whether we succeed in life or not. Sometimes we need help with that, yes, even therapists, but if that can help you achieve want you want more quickly, then it's good enough for me.
Remember, when you're ready to move forward and leave something negative behind, I'm on the end of a telephone.
Call me now on 024 7667 5520, invest in yourself!
Kind regards,
Nick
P.S. If you would like these posts and videos sent to you as a newsletter, please email me at ndhypnotherapy@btinternet.com and put "Subscribe" in the subject box.
Monday, 15 September 2008
Fears and Phobias
Fears & Phobias: Social Phobias Picture the scene: You are wandering around a supermarket or shopping arcade on your own. As you walk about, you're sure everyone is watching you - and it scares and embarrasses you. You find your heart beating much faster than usual, your throat becomes dry, or you sweat - or a combination of all three. You don't know why it's happening and you can't do anything about it. You panic and you feel you have to leave. Eventually you'll completely avoid the place or situation that made you feel this way. If this sounds like you - and it happens a lot of the time - it could be that you have one of, or a combination of, the following:
Social phobia: This is a fear of being in situations (usually in public) that will involve the sufferer thinking they are being watched or judged in some way. They might feel extreme anxiety that they'll make a fool of themselves in public or continually fear that, by their actions, they'll be putting someone out. They might have very low self-esteem and be extremely self conscious about speaking in public, or meeting new people. They might also have a specific fear of being sick, crying or blushing in public.
Agoraphobia: This is often thought of as a fear of open spaces, but it's actually a fear of feeling anxious wherever the anxiety occurs. These don't always have to be big, open spaces. When someone always avoids a place or situation where anxiety crops up, they become agoraphobic and can't face leaving a place that feels safe to them.
Claustrophobia: Claustrophobia is usually described as a fear of enclosed places. But it's more like a fear of not having an easy escape route. Anyone who experiences this phobia will feel that the predominating feeling is a need to be able to get out or get home very quickly. Claustrophobia means that you might; Immediately look for the way out when you enter a room, dread the moment the doors click shut on a train, hate the thought of using a lift, find car journeys difficult - especially motorways - because of the lack of an easy escape route.Panic Attacks
Panic Attack: A panic attack can be an extreme reaction to your phobia. They have a number of common symptoms like fast heartbeats, tightness in the throat, and dizziness. During a panic attack some people may also be convinced they are about to die and feel a complete and overwhelming need to get away from the situation they're in. These usually occur in late adolescence or early adulthood, but could happen at any stage of life.
Social phobia: This is a fear of being in situations (usually in public) that will involve the sufferer thinking they are being watched or judged in some way. They might feel extreme anxiety that they'll make a fool of themselves in public or continually fear that, by their actions, they'll be putting someone out. They might have very low self-esteem and be extremely self conscious about speaking in public, or meeting new people. They might also have a specific fear of being sick, crying or blushing in public.
Agoraphobia: This is often thought of as a fear of open spaces, but it's actually a fear of feeling anxious wherever the anxiety occurs. These don't always have to be big, open spaces. When someone always avoids a place or situation where anxiety crops up, they become agoraphobic and can't face leaving a place that feels safe to them.
Claustrophobia: Claustrophobia is usually described as a fear of enclosed places. But it's more like a fear of not having an easy escape route. Anyone who experiences this phobia will feel that the predominating feeling is a need to be able to get out or get home very quickly. Claustrophobia means that you might; Immediately look for the way out when you enter a room, dread the moment the doors click shut on a train, hate the thought of using a lift, find car journeys difficult - especially motorways - because of the lack of an easy escape route.Panic Attacks
Panic Attack: A panic attack can be an extreme reaction to your phobia. They have a number of common symptoms like fast heartbeats, tightness in the throat, and dizziness. During a panic attack some people may also be convinced they are about to die and feel a complete and overwhelming need to get away from the situation they're in. These usually occur in late adolescence or early adulthood, but could happen at any stage of life.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
